Welp. Chances of anyone reading this is slim...buuuuuuut...
I've got a problem. I've got a serious problem. Carl ate my hands. They're missing. He kind of cooked them up...and ate them! Seriously? Caaaaarrrrlllll....
I guess I can't blame him though. I mean, he was sort of hungry, so why not chop of my hands, cook them up, and eat them? All he had was that craving to eat hands. He can't help it - at least that's what he says.
Here I am now. Down to nubs, but somehow I can still type quite well, actually. I mean, look at me! I'm awesome, bro. But you ain't dude, so don't lie.
ANYWAYS...someone should get Carl some help before he eats someone else's hands. Hands are kind of important in the endeavor called life. Keep that in mind, my children. #YOLO. Hahaha. Just kidding. Don't ever say that or I can end that one life you have. HA. Just kidding again....but no, really. I'm a compulsive liar. Maybe. I'm not sure. Anyways. Uhm. Bye.
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